shes gone... left us in a sudden.. no one prepared.. all this while she was okay.. but only a normal demam2 org tua.. yes she got a diebetes but she died with heart attack causes..
Monday morning - 28072008
baru nk start keje.. ye laaa monday morning.. haruslah pepagi dah on ym.. suddenly ila buzz me to stori mori a new gossip.. then abah called informed that nenek is at CCU Hospital Selayang.. the doc said there was no hope anymore and lets called all the relative to come... abah tried to use the best word to me so i can understand that nenek is only waiting for her 'time'. I called ila since shes working at UKM so we can go together and called Ezwan to fetch us at my office. 3 of us never been to Hospital Selayang before this but we managed to reach there. it was before lunch time. straight away went to CCU ward and the good things here is in hospital selayang they got 2 rooms for family. So, we have to takae turn to get into ward to visit nenek. when i was in with ezwan, nenek dah x sedar ape dah.. leher dah bertebuk.. nenek kene heart attack sampai diniding jantung die pecah. doc pon x nak amik risiko utk anta ke IJN n suggest to wait there until the 'time'. mmg rase x pecaye sgt dgn bende yang akan berlaku nih.. x caye dah nenek akan pergi.. I baru berangan nenek akan jumpe lagi sorang cicit as im expecting now and its anytime... while waiting at the room sorang2 ade sedare datang .. n i keep on bace yassin utk nenek.
its all started at 3 something.. nurse rushing to our family waiting room and called 2 persons 2 come in.. i know the time is become nearer and nearerr. At that time.. ezwan dah balik ke bangi utk fetch Iffah at taska and do some packing. after a while mak keluar n called everyone in the room because nenek is totally dying... shes about to left.. when i entered the room, i whispered kalimah Lailahaillah many times at nenek.. hoping she selected to get Husnul Khatimah.. All acik.. mamak (called my uncles mamak), atuk sedare, nenek sedare, grandchilds is in there.. at 1615 she officially left us. At that time while everybody is crying i felt empty.. i saw ila , mak crying hardly... but i cant. at that time only my tears falling down.. Innalillah... i smsed ezwan and informed him.
then, i tumpang sedare utk balik kg.. sampai sane.. buat ape2 yang patut. all family members decided to bury nenek on next morning as we want to settle down everything by ourselves. petang tu jenazah nenek sampai kat rumah.. n we started to bace yassin. maghrib, ezwan n iffah pon smpi. Ariff kene kuarantin at rumah nenek Klang so he missed the moment. start malam kitorang bergilir2 bace quran 30 juzuk smpi pagi. sume cucu, anak, cucu menatu, anak2 sedare nenek, adik nenek kitorang masing2 take turn bace Quran. last juzuk done by my the only brother Apit after Subuh prayer. then, we read together from Surah Al-Alaq until surah Al-Ikhlas.
Tuesday - 29072008
rumah nenek dah semakini ramai orang.. kebanyakn sedare mare dah datang.. nenek punyer member2 lame pon ade yang datang.. now its time to mandikan jenazah. i dont want to miss this opportunity.. i want to get experience from this. mase mule2 nk mandikn nenek i cannot stop myself to cry.. im hardly cry as i terbayang tangan ni lah yang belai2 i mase kecik2 .. yang mandikan i.. cos im her first grandchild.. i stopped for a while and continue back. same jugak time mengkafankan jenazah.. i pon buat same.. rase takut.. insaf.. x bersedia nk mati.. all mixed up. and last sembahyang kan jenazah nenek. but ezwsan didnt allow me to go to graveyard due to my look.. im looking extremely exhausted. while all people went to graveyard im staying at home and fall asleep. seriously lps2 tu baru rase badan sengal.. sakit sgt.. padahal i same2 membalik2 kan badan jenazah nenek mase memandikan die. rase puas hati sgt.. yang uruskan nenek sume totally anak2, menantu2, n cucu2. my nenek sedare mintak keutamaan pada family bile geng2 nenek kat kg nk same2mandikan n kafankan jenazah nenek. nenek among the earliest person in kampung as her father was the one who bukka penempatan kat kg ni. she is one of the old timer. most of people in HYB know her. smpikn ade sorang minah cine datang menanges kat rumah bile tau nenek meninggal. die sgt terkilan sbb tau lambat nad by the time die dah tau.. nenek dah siap dikebumikan.
Nenek yang i kenal.. seorang yg kelakar.. kalo anak cucu sume berkumpul die la tukang karutnyer kitorang nih sampai tergelak x cukup nafas.. struggling to spread kasih sayang seadil2nya kat anak, cucu, menantu. die lah orang kuat kat rumah.. time kenduri.. time raye.. time nak raye... mmg die lah orang kuatnyer.. my wedding n adik i punyer wedding pon kitorang buat kat kampung.. mmg nenek lah orang kuatnye.. time i kawen.. nmpak sgt excited pasal ni cucu die yang first kakwen.. lps tu ila pulak kawen.. pon die lah orangnyer. started 2004 until 2007 rase paling byk kenduri kat rumah nenek dari kenduri kawen ke kenduri cukur jambul aqiqahnye.. cucu laa cicit laa.. baju kurung.. baju melayu anak2 i pon nenek i jahitkan.. baru blk anta kaen kat nenek.. smbil borak2 smbil2 tuh die jahit tgk2 dah siap dah baju kurung iffah mase tu.. last baju kurung iiffah n aqish n baju melayu ariff nenek jahit.. mase bln 3 ke 4 arituh.. ahad lps 27082008 ade jugak pesan kat mak utk nenek jahitkan baju raye bebdak ni.. nmpaknyer x sempat. so bg kat adik mak utk jahit...
Atuk kesian sgt.. die nmpak cam x fully recovered lagik.. recovered is not the best word i think.. fully redha... yess.. tetibe kang beborak die menanges tetibe ade bende yang nenek suke laa kat dalam bakul motor die... xnak naek rumah atas..xnak masuk bilik laa.. x nak tgk sume barang nenel.. so mak yg kemas n pack sume simpan.. die nk bilik laen n mamak Pie tgh looking forward utk buat satu lagi partition kat umah nenek utk bilik baru atuk. Insya Allah he will accept slowly.
As for me.. Alhamdulillah.. i redha pemergian die.. Insaf .. takut.. sume ade.. when is my time?? just get ready.. buat baek dgn orang.. dunie ni xde ape sgt utk dikejar.. hanye kepuasan peribadi.. kejar dunie smbil cukupkan bekalan di 'sana'
Al-Fatihah utk Fatimah Datullah.. semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan besama orang2 yang beriman full stop